50th Anniversary - CMA Awards

Y'all. I have been looking forward to this night for QUITE some time. I mean, I love the CMAs in general, but this year? This year was the 50th anniversary! 

Jeff thought we already went to this last year. I kindly informed him that the award show we went to was the 50th anniversary of the ACMs. Very different. 

He didn't seem to think so. He also didn't seem to care. 

Okay, so in case you wanted to watch with me (because I'm sure you all wanted to subject yourselves to that), I took the same documentation approach I did last year: to just write as I go.

So let's begin. 

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Um, the opening. 

I was getting misty-eyed from the get-go, and the chills were so present you would have thought I was in a dad gum meat locker... but by the end? By the end I was sobbing.

(I'm also writing this on the first commercial break because SO much happened in the beginning I couldn't keep up). 

Okay back to the opener. We kicked off the night with tons of historical acceptance speeches, and then the medley. We had Vince Gill and Merle Haggard's youngest son, we had Carrie singing "Stand By Your Man," we had Alabama, we had Charlie Daniels and the Devil Went Down to Georgia, we had Reba singing Fancy, we were told "Don't Rock the Jukebox," and THEN...

...and then all those people brought out Randy Travis, sang Forever and Ever Amen, and Randy sang the very last "amen." And I was ugly crying. Breaks my heart guys. That sweet man has fought one heck of a road to recovery to sing one word. Life is just so fragile. And so special. I really don't think there was a dry eye in that arena. Such a sweet moment. 

And when I say "ugly crying," I'm not kidding. I'm pretty sure Jeff was rethinking forever and ever (amen). But what can I say? I'm a sensitive human. I feel all the feels.

So I love Carrie and Brad as hosts. They've been doing this for over five years and it still hasn't gotten old to me. They're just funny. And good together. I mean they brought out Tim and Faith Barbies, put them on a pink Barbie "tour bus" and sang:

"Let's make love on this bus, I wanna feel your plastic touch."

 I mean it's just funny. 

And with every award show, we have the presenters. And this year, the fantastic...fabulous...freakin' flexible five presented single of the year. 

And Aly Raisman just popped on over from practice and threw a skirt on top. 

Like...what? I mean I guess the girl is just stickin with what she knows.

Single of the Year - Thomas Rhett!

Awww Thomas, you're like a small child and it's your first win for single of the year. Or maybe like ever since your career just started. But you go boy!! 

Also, I love when people thank Jesus. Thank Jesus. Thank your spouse. And shed some tears. We viewers eat it up. 

Wait. Why does Carrie look like a rosegarden? Or an old lady quilt? 

Like I appreciate that her outfits are "through the decades," but still. (wide eyed emoji)

Performance: Kelsea Ballerini - Peter Pan

Helloooo Travis Wall. I see you. And I'm glad I see you, cause Kelsea is on the struggle bus. Nerves? Sinus infection? Still emotional about Randy? Not sure, but c'mon girl. 

But Travis Wall flying around in the sky behind her? Yes please. I see you Peter Pan. 

Song of the Year - Humble and Kind

TIMMY!!! We love Timmy!! And his writer is actually the one who got the award but that's fine, I support writers. But what's not fine is when Olivia Newton John gave her the award whilst wearing a suit. C'mon Sandra Dee.

Performance: Jason Aldean + Brooks and Dunn
....so three men strumming guitar in unison. 

OUTFIT CHANGE - She looks like a chandelier and I love it. 

Maren Morris - please lead my Sunday morning choir. I will hallelujah with you until the cows come home. Speaking of, this just in, a text from Kristie: "can you have a trombone at your wedding? I'm feeling it." 

#hallelujah 

This just in, a text from Ryan: "If church was more like what Maren Morris just did, there'd be more butts in the pews." 

#amen

Okay, I love how after every commercial we get an old video from historical awards. I am EATING UP the fiftieth anniversary, y'all. 

Jennifer Garner is presenting! I heart Jennifer Garner. Honey, I'm glad you're here. And she and Brad were BFFs as kid. I mean she didn't say that exactly, but that's what I interpreted. 

New Artist of the Year - Maren Morris. 

And Kelsea didn't look happy with the outcome. Also, why was Cole Swindell up for this category. In the words of my future husband: "hasn't that guy been around for like five years?" Yes. Yes he has. 

Performance: Garth Brooks and Tricia Yearwood 

A married person medley. Musical people who marry each other are lucky. Not everyone gets to sing together...well, and sound good. Ya know what? I bet they sing to each other whilst doing the big wiggle. 

YEP. No doubt. 

Performance: My girl, Carrie. Too bad I hate this song. There are very few songs of hers I dislike, but I just can't get on board with Dirty Laundry. Okay fine, and I miss her crotch-high boots from last year. 

But I'm still rooting for her in Entertainer of the Year. 

Album of the Year - Eric Church

Ehhhh not my first pick. I kind of just wanted Faith (who was presenting) to give it to Carrie since there's alleged bad blood there. #youngerblondewithpipesandlegs

Little Big Town Performance: Katy's involuntary bathroom break. 

Outfit Change - Carrie as Batman 

But not gonna lie - I was digging this outfit. 

Performance: Miranda Lambert: Vice

I hate this song too. But I will give it to Miranda - she sounds solid every single performance. She may not have Carrie/Faith/Reba/Tricia pipes, but girl knows what she can do and she does it well. Let's all strive to be Mirandas in life. 

Also, this just happened. Me and Kristie gossiping like we are in the inner Nashville circle. 

Oh hi there Matthew. 

#awrightawrightawright

Performance: Timmy

Humble and Kind. Can this be playing in everyone's head from now until November 8th? Words to live by. If I saw Tim McGraw, I would hug him. #andsqueezehisbicep

So Elvira is like one of my favorite songs (Brad and the Oak Ridge Boys just did a little diddy). I think it's because of the base line (giddyup bahumda bahumda bow wow). 

...you just said that out loud, didn't you? :)

Performance: Alan Jackson and George Strait- Remember When + Troubadour

As IF we're emotionally stable... Because we're not. Just in case you wondered. And with historical acceptance speeches playing in the musical interludes? And then "the king" walked out. Guys. Not enough tissues in Texas.
...for like just me.

Vocal Due of the Year - Brothers Osbourne

Me: "NOOO." 

Nothing against Brothers O, I just really wish Joey and Rory would have won. #heartstrings

OH - hey so Brad wanted to get in on the floral foliage too. It's like a three-piece peony.
Not sure what decade this is...but I'm diggin Carrie's dress. I neeeeeeed it. #gimmeallthered

Peeps. It's 8:54. And I'm fading. I'm getting old. Why can't these shows start at like 4p? 

(cracks neck, rolls shoulders, refills wine)

Okay, I'm back. Let's do this. 

Performance: Keith Urban - Blue Ain't Your Color

#AUSSIESUNITE

I do like this song, but it's slow. And again. It's 8:54. There should be a rule that if you perform after the halfway mark, you do an upbeat performance.

Vocal Group of the Year - Little Big Town

Also, they said there was going to be a Dolly tribute tonight.
...I think I found it. 

Like I'm not sure who she is, but I now feel like I know her quite well.

Performance: Beyonce + Dixie Chicks

You didn't sing Goodbye Earl, so I no longer am interested. I mean the Beyonce song was good. But Justin and Chris last year were much better. Also, I couldn't give this performance my full attention (and therefore feedback), because Jeff made me bake him some cookies. #sigh

Pinnacle Award - Kenny. I wholeheartedly support that. I've seen him twice in concert. He's so good. And so smoking hot (with a hat on).

Performance: Chris Stapleton (and wife Stapleton) and Dwight Yoakam

Performance: Luke Bryan

Is it just me, or are all of his songs starting to sound alike...? Like, I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm starting to lose interest in his music. (insert monkey covering eyes emoji)

Lee Greenwood singing God Bless the USA. Why couldn't that have been a whole performance in itself? 

I think I missed a Carrie outfit but Jeff is really over this show and won't let me rewind.

Performance: FGL and Timmy McGraw. 

I have a serious crush on Tim McGraw. It's ever-growing. He just gets better with age. And then he came on stage and I bout melted.

Then I hear "I'm better looking..." and pan my phone to the right and see this. 

Sigh. Yep. Timmy vs. Jeffrey. Close call. (wide eyed emoji)

Female Vocalist of the Year - Carrie Underwood

Oh wait. She's crying. I'm crying. 

I have issues. I'm too invested.

Or invested just enough. 

I just seriously love seeing people follow their passions and get emotionally overwhelmed when it works out. All the feels. 

Okay, I just researched it. Miranda has won Female Vocalist the past SIX years. No wonder Carrie cried. Sweet girl hasn't won ANY CMAs since 2008. And I totally went back and rewatched. Miranda was so happy for her. 

MOVING ON. The DOLLY TRIBUTE.

Jennifer Nettles and Penatonix - Jolene

REBA IS SINGING 9 TO 5. 

No better person to sing this one. 

Kacey Musgraves - Here You Come Again

Martina and Carrie and Kacey and Reba and Jennifer - I Will Always Love You

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That was good. I'm so glad they didn't leave it to one person. And I'm so glad they let Reba end it. But this is when I feel bad for Miranda. If you don't have mutant lungs, you don't get invited to the party. 

Male Vocalist of the Year - Hairy Man Stapleton!

Remember last year when we didn't really know who he was and we weren't really sure if he had eyes? 

Well now we do (and he does). And we're a fan. You won a prize, so make another album. K thanks. 

So if you aren't watching live, we are TEN MINUTES BEHIND and still have a performance and an award to go. I mean, my inner granny is wailing. It's a school night, y'all. 

Oh we're back. Last leg, people!

Performance: Brad Paisley - Today

My current favorite song. And with videos of old acceptance speeches all the way up to tonight's acceptance speeches? The perfect ending song. So many chills. And Kimberly is so dang proud of him. I want to be in the Paisley family. 

This just in - the Cleveland Indians just tied up the World Series, Jeff's iPad died, and he just freaked out and ran to his bedroom to finish watching. #byefelicia

Aaaaaaand T-Swifty is back. To present the biggest award of the night!!

And the Entertainer of the Year goes to.......

((drumroll please))

GARTH BROOKS!! 

I mean Carrie's face broke my heart a little bit (girl has been trying to get this award for like ten years..), but Garth's concert blew my socks of last year (maybe these things are a year in arrears..?) so I'm way happy for him. 

You know what else I'm happy about? 

 I can go to bed. 

Happy 50th Anniversay, CMAs!!

...aaaand goodnight. 

CMA Country Christmas

So one of the first things I thought of when planning my KUWK 25 Days of Christmas was CMA's Country Christmas. I watch it every single year. It's festive - it's country - it's a must. So on Day 3, I turned on all the Christmas lights, jumped in my pajamas, poured me some hot cocoa and tuned it. OH - and naturally blogged my thoughts. 

Ohhhh Jennifer Nettles. 

I think she could be a Who. You know - the ones from Whoville. In the How the Grinch Stole Christmas?? With me now? She has on a sparkly gold hat that covers a fourth of her head. To me that equals a Who. 

Oh look! She's high kicking! Go Rockette Nettles, go! 

Okay, so the opener wasn't bad - it was just the same. As the past three years. But I guess you just go with what works. But I loved the dancers and I love "Man with the Bag," so I don't really have much negative for this.

Darius Rucker is wearing jeans. I mean - I know this isn't a red carpet deal, but c'mon man, throw on some khakis. I do love him though. His voice makes me smile. Why yes, Hootie, I will go walking in a winter wonderland.

11 minutes in and J-Net changed. Think she's trying to keep up with Carrie on those outfit changes?

Charles Kelley is like the Ken doll of country music. And I would not mind him under my tree this year. I wonder why he's performing without the other 2/3rds of Lady A. Maybe they drew straws. Boy's got some pipes though - he should do more solos. 

Oh Martina. So back at the ACMs in April, Jeff and I laughed through her entire performance because she now makes the funniest faces when she hits high notes. #strugglebus

So I snapped this during the show and sent it to him. We got a good chuckle. I do love Martina though. Except when she hosts Y2Kountry on Sirius. Now that is more painful than those high notes. 

Kelsea Ballerini is wearing a dress instead of a graffiti wall! Win. Also - this performance was a turning point for me with her. She sounded really good while having herself a merry little Christmas. And she sang in her head voice and didn't scream at me. #carriescreamssometimes #butistillloveher

I love LeAnn Rimes' voice. Last year when she sang "Someday at Christmas" (in a middriff showing pencil skirt), I had that song on repeat the whole rest of the month. This year she busted out with a medley of God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen and Angels We Have Heard on High - but like an intense military sounding version. I was waiting for drummers to fall from the sky. In the words of my friend Krstie, "mohawks and this song don't go together." She speaks truth.

Dan + Shay busted out a great O Come Let Us Adore Him - but at this point in the show I realize we've hit all the slow carols. I mean, the audience is crying and I'm glad they were touched, but I need some Jingle Bells up in here.

46 minutes in and Jennettles is still in the same dress. I don't blame her. She's smoking. 

Brett Eldredge and Thomas Rhett singing I'll Be Home for Christmas to the little girl from St. Jude's gave me all types of warm fuzzies. Love those boys, love that organization, 

Jewel is on the stage. I'm confused. 

Oh praise be - Penatonix. I absolutely love them. They are just flawless each and every time they perform. (Which has been a lot by the way!) And they're from DFW - so hometown holler! They sang a song from their new Christmas album - I would recommend a listen, folks.

 Jennifer changed! ...into another green ensemble. Hmm. Alright. I think I like it. But it's like a cocktail dress meets a puffer vest. Like doesn't this thing look insulated to you??

Alright folks. Honesty time. I'm pretty disappointed with this show. We're halfway through and they just announced who's "up next," and it's all people that have already sang. So I'm guessing people just get to sing twice? Lame. Also - we've endured about 6 slow songs in a row. Pick up the pace, people. 

Martina and Michael W Smith up next singing "What Child is This" ....which is about a 2 on the upbeat scale. Can I get a sleigh bell for 500? Anyone? Anyone?

_____

Okay, guys, I'm sorry, but this is where I called it quits and got an hour of my life back. It just wasn't keeping my interest. Last year's show was so much better, and if you want to go relive it, you can find my post here (with YouTube links!). I personally just went and rewatched them all :) 

Hope you all have a WONDERFUL Friday and an even better weekend! 

22 Days until Christmas!

Until next time,
Katy

CMA Awards 2015

[cracks neck, rolls shoulders]

It's time. 

The 49th Annual CMAs are finally here! Normally I watch, take notes, and do a little recap for y'all the next morning, but this time I decided to actually document throughout the show. If I had a thought - I typed it out. If it needed a picture to support, I paused the TV and took one (so let's not judge the quality). 

So basically you can read the whole 3-hour show as if you were on the couch with me. You lucky lucky dogs.

Let's go. 

 

Star Wars... cute opening. Go with the trend of the world right now. Carrie Fisher, Guitar Solo, Garth Vador - funny. I'm on board. I'm with you. 

Okay then. Abrupt cut to an opener of..... Hank Jr. and Eric Church? Not my first choice, but to each his own. Oh, and then John Mellencamp. Oh, and then Keith Urban singing about John Mellencamp. 

How are we 12 minutes in and the only thing I've seen Carrie Underwood in is a Princess Leia outfit? 

There she is. And I just temporarily put down the Blue Bell. 
 

This is also when my phone literally blows up of all my friends commenting on Carrie's rocking body. Pretty sure she's skinnier post baby. I'm telling myself she has on spanx. 

(picks up spoon and resumes Blue Bell) 

Alright, I'm fully on board with how they addressed Blake and Miranda's split. Way to take one for the team, muppets. I'm also still extremely sad about that divorce, by the way. I should eat more Blue Bell. 

Oh hello there, Sam Hunt. 

Oh, Justin Timberlake. 

Hiya Luke Bryan. 

Steve Martin is one of my favorites actors. Him and Tim Allen. They're like those "dad" actors. And now I want to go watch Father of the Bride. And bawl my eyes out. Because you can't have one without the other.  

[This is the part of the blog where I realize I cannot type every thought that comes through my brain. Hold please.]

HEY! Something happened. 

Single of the Year: Girl Crush - Little Big Town

Again - not my personal choice, but (regretfully) no one asked me. Probably because I feel dirty and blushy and bashful when I sing it. I mean I get it... I just don't like it. 

OUTFIT CHANGE! 

...she looks like a peacock. 

So...Zach Brown minus the beanie gives me the willies. It's like someone hit him really hard on the head and all his hair shot through his face and came out his chin. 

Kenny is so dang yummy in a hat. Puts on a good performance, too. 

Song of the Year: Girl Crush - Little Big Town

...I'm having dejavu.

Oh my gosh, and now we're going to hear Girl Crush live. An hour in and there is just so much of the girl crushing going on. And I'm not just talking about me crushing on Carrie. But that indeed is happening.

WHAT IS KAREN FAIRCHILD WEARING?! That is a black bellbottom pantsuit twinkled with little bits of foil. That apparently fell off Kimberly Schlapman's skirt. They must have been also going for that Star Wars theme.

New Artist of the Year: Chris Stapleton

Uhh....this may make me a really bad country music fan, but who is he? I shall be researching him tomorrow at work. Also, does he have eyes? 

OUTFIT CHANGE! And a performance! 

Okay, those boots. They basically go up to her crotch. Boots should never go up to ones crotch. Know why? Cause that means your thighs are thin enough to fit in the same accessory as your ankle. NOT OKAY. 

It's actually perfectly okay, I'm just jealous.

Collaboration: JT and Chris Stapleton

Oh hey - remember when I didn't know who Chris Stapleton was? Who cares. Now he's on stage performing with Justin Timberlake and is therefore way cool and special. 

And this just in: he does have eyes! 

Justin Timberlake. What did you just do to Nashville? All things good and holy. Like him twitching is hot. Justin Timberlake can make a twitch look sexy. Chris, nice to meet you, I'm sure you're wonderful, but you have 23 pounds of hair and are standing next to JT. My focus has shifted.

OUTFIT CHANGE! 

....what is that? I don't understand. 

My friend Ryan just texted me asking when the Carrie/Justin duet was going to happen. Bless. That would blow my mind. 

Collaboration: Thomas Rhett and Fall Out Boy

This is probably the first time we've had dancers in a country award show since T Swift was in country. And I love how Thomas is trying really hard to interact with the lead guy from FOB and he is just having none of that. 

ALSO. Anyone seen Miranda? Again with the dejavu. 

Album of the Year: Long-Hair Stapleton

...whose wife has just as much hair as he does! So apparently Mr. Stapleton's album needs to spend some quality time with my earbuds. 

Kelsea Ballerini is wearing a graffiti wall. And I think it has a cape. 

Uhhh. Brad's college football performance. Brilliant. And so incredibly fun. I had chills. And it took me pretty much the whole song, but I finally found my boyfriend. Bruiser is FAMOUS! I love him. 

So - the whole time Blake performed I was playing a little WWMT (What Would Miranda Think?) Like...what would you do if your newly ex-husband was also a famous country star and performing like 3 feet in front of you? Be nostalgic? Miss him a little? Throw tomatoes? Take a "bathroom break?" I mean I just don't know. 

OUTFIT CHANGE! Back to back!

Prom gown followed by....is that red pleather? 

Okay - so far the highlight of this show is Pentatonix singing "Elvira." I need more of them. PS dad - you would like them.  Watch it here.

Group of the Year - Little Big Town

...so it's apparently their year. 

MIRANDA! We found her. And her pink tipped hair. Girl is rocking out about a bathroom sink. I will say she looks older to me. More mature. More independent. So now let's play the other way ... WWBT? 

OUTFIT CHANGE! 

....what are we on? #7?

Okay. I was literally laying down and then when Kacey Mugraves came on the screen I literally shot up in bed. But now I get it. Old school country. That's bold. You wear your leotard and sparkly tights in 2015 on a stage in front of the world. You do you. 

I take it back. My little ponies are running across the stage. No longer on board. 

I would also like every one to know that it's 9:30 p.m., and thanks to Daylight Savings it has been dark since like noon and I can barely keep my eyes open. Thirty more minutes. Pull your inner grandma up by her bootstraps. We can do this. 

Female Vocalist of the Year: Miranda Lambert

Am I reading into her every breath, or does she just look like she's had a rough week? Oh wait, she just said she "needed a bright spot this year." Poor sweet girl. You're going to be okay. Someone hug her. 

 OUTFIT CHANGE!

 

Sunshine meets genie in a bottle.

Collaboration: Reba and Brooks and Dunn

I can't get enough of that fiery little red-head with mutant lungs. She is just so spectacular. Flawless. You can tell she's a seasoned veteran and that stage is her natural habitat. Yes, yes, and absolutely.

Uhhh - Jennifer Nettles abs. Anyone? Anyone? She breathes and they move. She must work out with Carrie. And I bet they both wear Calia.

Male Vocalist of the Year: Chris Stapleton

So....I apparently should be ashamed that I just discovered this hairy hairy man tonight. He is a talented wonder and is now on the country map. And he just thanked his cousins in Kentucky. You are a precious country bumpkin.

Entertainer of the Year: Lukey Luke Bryan

Those teeth. Those hips. That heart. So sweet. 

Wait - it's over. And Carrie changed. Did I miss one? Or did she really just change for like the 3 seconds to say goodbye??

OKAY. And there we have it. We have successfully watched (and painfully documented) the 49th Annual CMA Awards. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go put my little head on the pillow and dream of what it would be like to rock crotch-high boots on stage. 

Thanks for watching/reading!

Until next time,
Katy